Black Friday

Amber is on her way to New Mexico in her shining new car leaving us with hearts full of love and pride for what a wonderful young lady she has become.It's her first big road trip alone and we are a little worried, but I know she will be safe. As she was leaving, I kept trying to offer her "one more cup of coffee" and was reminded that I am only emulating what my Nana used to do when we were ready to leave her after vacation. Years of guilt have haunted me because I moved away from my New York home when I was 19-years old, and with the exception of a few visits, really never went back. I thought I had abandoned my mother and started a cycle of kids growing up and leaving their parents far behind. In reality, it was Nana who embedded wanderlust in my soul. She married for the 5th and final time, James Forrest Plank, in the mid-1970's and left Rochester to the unheard of hinterlands of York, Pennsylvania. That represented a 6 hour drive to see my grandmother with whom I was so close. While the transfer of residence did afford us the opportunity of wonderful summer vacations in the picturesque mountains of Pennsylvania, it was so difficult to leave her after spending such great times together. She was the core of our little family unit. We had so many traditions and memories in which she was the focal point.

After she passed away, that sense of family togetherness also seemed to pass in my heart. Oh sure, doubts and questions nag as to whether I tried hard enough to maintain ties with my mom, sister, aunts, uncles and cousins. After all, it was I who moved so far away both geographically and emotionally.

With my mother's passing less than a year ago now, I have fallen into a black trench of "what could have been's" and "what should have's". Through the last few decades, I have attempted to create traditions and memories for my own three little chicklets, but it doesn't feel the same. Only two children were home for Thanksgiving and the other two didn't even call. Time is a great reminder of what we have and the lesson of holding dear to the here and now. In a minute, it is all gone and hopefully, if you are lucky, those precious memories and traditions will live on in the minds of those you have touched. So have that second cup of coffee;take time to enjoy each other and always be mindful of thanks.

Hope you are all well.